Exercise 4: Emotional Views Over Time, Part 2 (A Day)

This entry should be written the day after completing part one of exercise 4. Pretty interesting how feelings change in just 24 hours... Another note: part three should be completed one month from today.


It is Saturday 2/6/10
Right now this is how I feel about myself… I feel excited about moving forward with our decision to build a new house (finally!). My husband and I put earnest money down on a lot today just seconds after someone else had spoken with the seller about the same lot, talked with my uncle who is a realtor about putting our condo on the market, and made an appointment to write up a contract later this week with Debby our seller. We talked about our plans for the new house, and I am very excited. I am looking forward to having a new project, picking out furniture which I love doing, and decorating the new house which I also love doing. Funny thing is that I have a feeling my husband wants to decorate, and thinks I don't have a clue on how to decorate. No, we are not living in a bachelor's pad! We have a lot to do with our condo before we sell it but thankfully, it was gutted in 2002 and rebuilt in 2003 so there is not a whole lot to fix up before we put it on the market. At least I don’t think there is much work to do. My husband on the other hand thinks there is so much we have to do but I think it is more overwhelming for him than anything. My uncle will walk through everything with him and help us decide what needs to be redone. We walked the lot that we are holding today. It had been raining all week and we were up to our ankles in mud.
Yesterday, this is how I felt about myself… I remember feeling embarrassed and disappointed that I had lost my temper with my husband. In hindsight and not making any excuses on my behavior, it seemed that I did what I had to in order to feel “sane” again even though I looked like a maniac. I was feeling out of control of the situation, and the only way at the time I knew how to handle it was to completely flip out and run around like a chicken without a head. I guess it was a little funny even though it did not feel fun at the time. I was crying and didn’t know what to do with myself. I even felt self destructive at the time and had lost sight of what was important. At least there was some control there and I’m glad I didn’t go completely over the edge, because today was a much better day. Also looking back to what happened yesterday, I can't believe my husband still finds me attractive and loves me.